As Jesus was being nailed to the cross, perhaps even while they were nailing him to the cross, Jesus cried out, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.” (Luke 23:34).

It has always amazed me as I read that passage how much Jesus was willing to forgive. He had been through the mockery of two trials, been spit upon, abused, scourged, mocked and humiliated in more ways than we can ever imagine, yet He states His willingness to forgive. Jesus declares the Father to us (John 1:18), and in this, we see that the Godhead is wanting, more than anything, to forgive men and take man back into a relationship with Him. When we consider all of the ways mankind has sinned, and further consider what that sin has done to our relationship with God, it is amazing that God could want to forgive us. But He values the relationship with us more than anything else, and this is why He was willing to pay the price for our sins.

As we see Jesus on the cross, we then need to ask ourselves the question—Is there anything that anyone has done to us for which we are unwilling to forgive? Is there anything that someone has done to us that matches being nailed to a cross for sins we did not commit?

When we are unwilling to forgive, this wrong eats away at us in so many ways, spiritually, emotionally and physically. We grow angry at the sight of the one who has done us wrong. We become bitter and look for opportunities to avenge ourselves of the wrong. We sin against God and the brother who we bear a grudge against when we don’t forgive. We sin against ourselves, because we allow that person to control us, even when we don’t want them to. Can we imagine our enemy controlling us to the point that we can’t function? Yet this is exactly what happens when we don’t forgive.

And perhaps, the hardest thing for us to do is to learn to forgive ourselves. We beat ourselves up over sins that God has forgiven years ago, as if they are fresh always in our minds. If God is willing to forgive and has provided a way for us to be forgiven, then we must learn to forgive ourselves. If He has, and He has suffered the most wrong, we can forgive ourselves.

Jesus has left us an eternal example in His willingness to forgive—now, will we follow that example, or will we bear the grudges that hurt relationships for years to come? The decision, as always, is ours.